I stand here, empty handed, before the reality that has now sunk in my mind.
As the memories of my past trickle down, one by one, I begin to realize that I’m not the same.
I was never really put in this place, in this time, nor in this moment to simply blend within the rest.
You see, people have come to fascinate me… from the shallowness of most to the complete sincerity of, unfortunately, few.
I look around me and observe as everyone lives out this misconception of “life”.
The same redundant ideas, and same cycles of failure.
We’ve over-exhausted ourselves with trying to find ways to keep up with the trends around us.
To keep up with what’s “in” and in doing so, having our highest hopes in being accepted.
I’ve really tried to understand the vagueness that lies behind the empty words spoken, but nothing.
I can’t seem to grasp why people try to hide behind these walls of insecurity.
A world, a shield, that protects them from their true self.
What is there to fear?
Is it that we haven’t yet discovered ourselves?
Why is it that overtime we’ve lost the motivation and essence of embracing uniqueness?
I then stood back and realized that I was once found in this position.
The burning need to please… to fit in.
As much as I denied it, I would’ve killed to get that feeling of “belonging”.
I truly “died to be accepted”.
But I no longer stand that ground.
I no longer push aside that which lies within me.
I stand here facing reality: myself.